Monday, March 1, 2010

"O" Baby...


How would you feel if you realized after years of sexual experience, that the echoing, pulsating, body rippling sensations of climaxing you'd been feeling...was just the precursor to the "BIG O"? Ok, let me say it experience an orgasm for the first time...realizing that the ones before it were actually the climaxING and not the actual peak!

One, let's get on track so no one gets lost in the sauce. An orgasm is as defined (because everyone doesn't know) :intense or paroxysmal excitement; especially : an explosive discharge of neuromuscular tensions at the height of sexual arousal that is usually accompanied by the ejaculation of semen in the male and by vaginal contractions in the female.

So...we understand that it is a shaking, shivering, quivering, body shimmering with glistening sweat triggered from waves of sensual pleasure type deal. We understand that it is the "big finish" to some good and properly placed stroking. BUT...what if you'd been having the pre-cumming experiencing...never finishing...but THINKING that was it. When you do experience that toe-curling event...what goes through your mind? Do you embark on a fucking mission (double entendre intended) see how BIG the "O" can get? Do you become insatiable? Do you reflect on the times before (mates included) and resent the sex? 

I mean, how many of us...women, especially...KNOW our bodies well enough? How many of us are giving away our pleasure to men without receiving pleasure as well? Makes me wonder under what circumstances many of us began having sex to begin with. Possibly, we were so young that our bodies weren't ready for the act of sex, let alone the mental place a woman needs to be, to embrace her sexuality.

The best way to get pleasure out of your sexual activity, is to know YOUR body, get to know your MATE'S body, listen to one another, and be open. To talk before, (sometimes during) and after to make sure that you're giving/getting what each other needs. Finding your way around your level of comfort...testing your boundaries now and then for excitement so as not to fall into a sexual rut. I don't have a partner right now, but I do know that I want one who is willing to be patient with me (and I him) as we find our groove. Find out if you're into Tantric, Role-Playing, BDSM, etc...and learn to TRUST your mate and allow yourself to be free with them. Think about're at your most vulnerable. You're naked, unarmed (in every way) and you're allowing someone to connect with you by plugging into your body with theirs...shouldn't you experience it to the fullest? Reaching heights and walking (or staggering) away satisified? 

A friend asked me to ask this question and I decided to ask it, allowing for an open forum of people's personal stories about sex. Don't be shy. When did you first experience an orgasm? Did someone give you one? Or did you self-help? Are you a multi-orgasmic you squirt? Have you had a vaginal and/or clitoral orgasm ladies? Fellas, have you faked it? What gets you there? Are you in it for the "O" or the feeling of connecting? Yea, I'm all UP in your bedroom...tell me...I mean, us. lol


Anonymous said...

WoW....there it is. so that'ts it. A trust issue..Thanks for This is some real deep.

Da_Kween said...

Yes, I believe it's trust...the ability to tell the truth about what's poppin and what's not. lol

Anonymous said...

I first had an orgasm when I was self pleasuring as a teen, I think I was about 13. It was kind of like a drug because I continued chasing the high. As an adult woman experiencing sex, I KNEW when I didn't have one. Funny thing is, unless I just wanted to bust the brothers bubble, I didn't tell my partner that I didn't climax- sometimes a big mistake not to share that info. Keeps them mediocre and keeps you unsatisfied. I enjoyed the sex, but the big "O" seemed to be elusive only appearing by my own hand. I guess I felt I kind of "broke it" if you will. The first time a man gave me a vaginal orgasm, I almost screamed the rafters into tumbling. He thought I was crazy, I knew I had arrived for the first time! I still keep searching for the big "O", but I get it mostly from oral, or self exploration. Where's that one guy's number again? Thanks for your question.


"Halo Effect"

Da_Kween said...

Wow, I too went a long while before experiencing that "O" by way of a man. Before that it was strictly at my own hands *pun intended* LOL

It's something else to realize how much we'll sacrifice in the name of "keeping the peace"...allowing for men to believe they're satisfying us when they're not. Some communication and self-priority is definitely in order with a LOT of women.



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