Tell a story of your most embarrassing sex experience...
Well this is easy...
The SAME mofo I regretted screwing is involved. Yea, THIS should've been a warning to me. Actually, there were three up until the big Non-Bang. Each time we'd tried to screw...something went horribly wrong.
THIS particular time (the third penalty flag thrown on the field) was most embarrassing. Here I am, wearing my sexiest drawlz, shaved to smooth proportions, tits freed...skin softer than a punk bish. He's all up in my wetness with his fingers...testing the waters.
Just as he pulls up to it...my legs widen for entry...and BANG!!! BOOM!! CHAH-LEE...the horse.
My foot curled up like the Wicked Witch of the East. Imagine freshly pedicured toes all special bus looking and the muscle in my calf hardening like bad biscuits! OWWW!!! Meanwhile...as I'm in excruciating pain and dude is doing what he's doing to help me...I feel silly. Cooch wet, panties now off...cool air hitting it...all while I howl in pain and roll around like Peter on Family Guy.
"Ssssssssssssssssss...aaaaaaaaaah"
O__O
I finally made it to the point that I could force myself to stand up to bring the deformity that was my foot back to normal. It pained for a whole day afterward.
The only name I was screaming...was Chah-lee's. lmaooo
9 comments:
Girl!! The picture alone has me over here cracking up. Too funny! LOL CHARLIE HORSE!!!!!!
I love that pic...sooo apropos!
lol..
Oh hell yeah, that's happened to all of us once or twice. I used to wonder if it was just me, when one night my boys started talking about it.
Years ago when I was in college I was seriously constipated, so I took something for it and waited for sweet relief to come. Instead of sweet relief I get a knock on my door. It's this young woman I've been trying to hook up with for awhile. She was looking nice, we chatted for awhile and ended up in my bed making out. The whole time my stomach is doing twists and turns and making more moves than Ex-Lax (yeah that).
So anyway one thing leads to another and I'm going down on her doing my human beat box thing and she's loving it; and then she wants to return the favor. When she does I can't hold it in anymore and I have the worst gas.
Yeah...she made a face...she stopped making her magic...she got up...she left and she never came back.
I don't blame her, it was pretty foul.
first im fighting back tears of laughter and then read Reggie's comment o_0 i woulda punched ya ass for that Reg..that was wrong
I had a comment..
Reggie's comment made me laugh ao hard I forgot it... *still gigglin*
Reggie~ *DEAD at you* LMAO
Budda~ He's a nut ain't he?
Sundae~ Yea...he blew me with that one. *smh*
Did you really say "he blew"? FTFO!
How about I get one EVERY TIME I CUM?
Don't know if it's the dialysis or just my body.
I wish you could hear me laughing at you and Reggie's stories right now. OMG! I'm too thru!
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